My ex husband is not a bad person. He’s been a stand up guy and paid child support for years. As he should. This is not an extraordinary measure. It is what is expected of him.

There is lots of emotional energy swirling around, not all of it positive, most of it negative. It concerns the travel plans of my progeny over Christmas, or the lack of travel plans.

I don’t want to go into it out in semi-public like this. Suffice it to say that I have a choice to get really wrapped up in this, or not get wrapped up at all. I am choosing the latter. Not wrapped. At all.

My life has been fundamentally altered by my relationship with my ex husband. Financially I will never recover from my losses relating to my marriage. My life, my problem. I have struggled more or less over the last few years to keep my head above water. Never have I gone back and asked for more money. Not when the oldest lost her retainer, not when car insurance reared it’s ugly head for both girls or when gas went to $4.00 per gallon. I let him know he could reduce his payment when I paid off the braces, out of my own pocket.

The class that the state mandates for adults to take (which my ex never took) taught that any problems between parent and child, barring the safety of the child being at stake, was just that, between the parent and child. That we shouldn’t attempt to shape or manipulate the behavior of one parent through the child.

I’m going to try and keep it that way.

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